So, about 36 hours after venturing into Facebook land, about 12 of those hours have been spent on Facebook. The other hours, obviously, I did much more insignificant things, like child rearing, graduate school paper writing, eating dinner with good friends, working out, getting therapy. You know, the mundane things in life. My Facebook time, actually, has been the most productive, most interesting of those 36 hours.
I have managed to get almost 100 friends in this time. In real life it would have taken 33 years to get 100 friends. Maybe longer. It’s amazine. Here I am going through traditional avenues of trying to meet people: school, work, neighbors, parties, and all I really had to do was sign up for Facebook. Truly, truly fascinating. I also have been privy to exclusive clubs, such as one that punches people in the mouth until they straighten their sh** out, and another that supports the San Diego Chargers. I’ve been wooed by a club that promotes cuddling. I like cuddling. I may consider joining that one.
But I tell you, in strict confidence, I like this Facebook thing. It really does cut down on the need to leave one’s house. All anyone really needs is a wi-fi Internet connection, a laptop, a glass of water and a Facebook account. Especially in these days of Swine Flu and economic meltdown, it’s better to be confined yet still be a part of the living, breathing world. I know that Facebook lives and breathes because it allows me to tell everyone how I’m feeling through this neat trick called “emoticons.” And only living, breathing things have feelings.
It’s calling me back. I’ve been away far too many minutes, and I hear its robotic voice alerting me to new posts and comments that must be addressed in due time. This Facebook thing is a recipe for total cohesion. I really think it could save Humanity.